Monday, March 28, 2011

my turtle, charlie

My Charlie.

There are so many words to described this kid.





S...L...O...W... as a turtle.

Everything in his four year old world revolves on Charlie time.

When he plays, he is fully engrossed in the moment. He is never thinking ahead of what's next on the agenda.

When he tells his (long) version of the story, I tend to have the desire to drive him to the bottom line, but he has so many rich details to reveal, that I've learned better.

But, I'm feeling so torn lately. I feel like he is constantly hearing from me, "Charlie! We need to hurry."

In the morning when we are shoving down breakfast and getting dressed, Charlie just wants to cuddle on the couch with his Skipit and take it slow.

Charlie is on Charlie time. I swear he is hiding a secret cruise control button on his body somewhere.

Meanwhile, I hear the clock ticking away.

Tonight, once again this came to the forefront. Charlie was enjoying his shower playtime. He had all his dinosaurs and other toys in there with him. He could play in there for hours. However, we had 3 kids to get ready for bed, homework to be finished, and truth be told, I was beat and needed the kids in bed before Survivior started.

As he slowly started to wind down his shower time by using Charlie time, I said, "come on Charlie, you are always as slow as a turtle!"

I know it wasn't anything too awful to say to him, but the kid does not need to hear "always" statements in his life already. It further nailed me to what I'm struggling with.

How do I let Charlie be Charlie, Charlie time and all, without going nuts?

How do I let the kid enjoy his moments when we really do have other places to go and things to do.

I reassure you that it is not always like this, but I just want to find a way to let him be without having negative consequences such as being tardy to school.

So as I was contemplating all the ways I can help Charlie learn to speed it up around here, it dawned on me that perhaps I am the one who has a lesson to learn.

Perhaps I could use my own cruise control button. Perhaps I can slow down, take it all in, and enjoy.

Just like my turtle, Charlie.

Much love,


Mommy of three said...

Our kids are clones. My middle is slow as molasses too. He even eats slow! When we out for ice cream, the rest of us finished long ago and he's hardly gotten started,
It is very frustrating sometimes--a lot of the time. And even though I try not to, he gets nagged a lot.
This is a great reminder.
Love from,

Erin said...

Reading about your little turtle reminded me of Ann Voscamp in One Thousand Gifts that I've been reading this week (excellent book by the way- heady and poetic at the same time). She says, "Race for more and you'll snag on time and leak empty...hurry always empties a soul..."

Psalm 39:6 We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing.

Quoting Mark Buchanan on his biggest regret in life, "Being in a hurry. Getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. I cannot think of a single advantage I've ever gained from being in a hurry. But a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing...through all that haste I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away."

Looks like Charlie's got it all figured out actually...

Janna said...

I have a turtle in my house too. Not a slow one, but one that likes to play or do her thing. I feel the same - like I'm always saying HURRY. But they only have such a short time to be little, so I struggle with the same things as you. Wouldn't you love to be that carefree again?

Melissa said...

I was the same way! My aunt used to call me Molasses. I only had one speed…sloooowwww.