Sunday, May 29, 2011


When Luke was 1st diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at 4, we went into hyper mode of doing everything possible to help him navigate the world more easily. I don't regret the time and effort spent shuffling him along with an 18 month old and newborn from therapy to therapy because it was beneficial for him.

However, I must admit that our world became Asperger's Syndrome.

Every book I read was about Asperger's Syndrome.

Every thing I researched was about Asperger's Syndrome.

Every extra minute that I had was dedicated to learning more about Asperger's Syndrome.

It was exhausting.

Despite the best intentions to help our son, I began to see Asperger's when I looked at my son instead of just seeing Luke.

Fast forward 4 years, we have ended most therapies. He has progressed so far that he is remarkably undisguished from his typical peers. He's always been mainstreamed in a regular classroom. He does not require an aide. He has made friends. And most of all, he is content and confident.

That said, Asperger's has not been erased.

Nor would we want it to be.

Luke is Luke. Asperger's or not, he is who he was made to be. No longer do I see him through an Asperger's filter.

I just see Luke.

Luke's Asperger's makes him very sensitive to touch. He is not one cuddle. Even as an infant, he preferred to not be held. Which is why it is so special when out of the blue he wanted to rest his sweet head on my lap during his brother's t-ball game. I rested my mama hand on his chest as I questioned whether or not he would instinctively remove it, but instead he embraced my affection and let me revel in the moment.

It is moments like this that make all the moments in the mommy trenches disappear.

Much love,


Betsi* said...

Oh, I am so there with you. I so get it. You are am awesome mama to that very special boy!

april@gingerbread girl said...

that sounds like an amazing moment for so glad you were able to share it with your little guy!!

Kirsten said...

awesome. just awesome. what a sweet moment.

Laurie J said...

what an absolutely precious moment to capture on camera. yay for the sweet, sweet feel of your boys head on your lap. rejoicing with you! <3

hannah singer said...

this is beautiful. thanks for sharing this sweet part of your life.

Lora said...

that is so sweet. so happy for you. :)

Jessica Johnson said...

ahh i love this post. we were so in the same boat when ashlyn was diagnosed. i was obsessed with all things hearing impaired. but lately i've come to realize that her deafness is PART of her, not ALL of her.

michelle michael said...

thanks for making me cry, sweet mama! we never know what parenthood is going to bring us, and so much of the time it is soooo good!

Four Flights said...

What a beautiful, sweet moment. I can see how that would be special for you two. Praise God for you being there and present for it :)

Jami said...

i'm tearing up at that picture. beautiful post friend, you're a good mama

{cuppakim} said...

amazing. what a sweet moment. even sweeter that you were able to capture it for all time. not a mama myself, but i love when my friends little ones snuggle up with me. i imagine this is 1,000,000 times better. :) <3

Babymama said...

That is the sweetest thing I've read all day.


Belinda - The Lattimore Acre said...

I have tears. What a precious moment xo