Friday, July 22, 2011

a tale of two stories

I'm going to give you two versions of a story. Your job is to try and guess which one is true.
Story 1:
Once upon a time there was a impecabibly dressed mama who decided it would be a wonderful day to make homemade ice cream. Her 3 lovely boys were so perfectly behaved that she thought they deserved a delicious treat. So she calmly took all 3 children to the grocery store. Child 1 read the list, child 2 pushed the cart, and child 3 put the goods in the cart. Meanwhile, the beautiful mother sipped on a virgin pina colada, with an umbrella garnish, as she followed behind her sweet young children. Once home, the 3 obedient boys, asked their mother, "Dear Mother, how may we help you prepare our homemade ice cream which you so graciously offered to help us make?" One by one, the children listened to their mother as she softly explained the 3 simple steps. Once the children filled and shook their bags, they gently put them in the freezer and found something to keep themselves busy with while Mother sat comfortably in the chair reading her favorite book. They didn't even ask, "Is it done yet?" once. The ice cream was ready and the children sat at the table and waited for their sprinkles, chocolate syrup, and cherries with their bottoms firmly planted on their chairs and hands folded on the table. Mother put the toppings on the table and without even having to remind the boys, they took turns with the toppings. Upon tasting their homemade ice cream, they exclaimed with joy, "Oh dear Mother, thank you for teaching us to make homemade ice cream. This is the best ice cream we've ever had."
The End.

Story 2:
Once upon a time there was an exhausted mother who was stuck at home for 3 days with her boys. 2 boys had surgery a few days earlier. The youngest fully recovered but the oldest was taking a looonnnggg time to recover. The mother felt sorry for them (and herself) because they had to cancel plans to go to the beach. She figured they would check off an item off their summer list by making homemade ice cream. She piled her boys into the car. They stopped on their way to pay for VBS. The oldest child went out to the grass area in front of the office to throw up because the certain surgery he had leaves a horrible funk in the mouth for DAYS. She then grabbed her kids and ran into the grocery store and grabbed the very specific ingredients for the recipe which she googled. Once they got home she called them one by one into the kitchen. The two young ones were excited. The oldest (with the funky mouth) dragged his feet into the kitchen. She was about to say, "We're making homemade ice cream and it is going to be fun whether you feel like it or not" but decided to keep those thoughts to herself. While the ice cream froze, the anxious kids asked a zillion times when it would be ready. The mother decided to take the boys swimming as a distraction but they quickly returned because the youngest has taken up the habit of biting for humor. He screamed the whole way home. Once the ice cream was ready the boys sat at the table and started opening the sprinkles before the ice cream was on the table. They proceeded to load the ice cream up with toppings. 2 thought it was satisfying. 1 (Charlie), always the fussy eater, took a few bites and left the table. Mom decided to go old school and add bananas and chocolate. She took a bite and quickly realized why Charlie bailed on his ice cream. It was gross.
The End.





At least we tried! Don't worry, I won't be posting this recipe.


Laurie J said...

you crack me up.

Erin said...

Sounds about right...ideas seem so perfect in our, togetherness, excited kids...but it just doesn't always play out that way in reality. That's where we learn just to go with it, right?!

gratefulmama said...

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that story number 2 was the true story? I hope Luke recovers quick... no fun that he still isn't better yet!

Nessa said...

This is hilarious... it sure looks yummy!

Jessica said...

Story 1 is most definitely what happened, right? :-)

You are too funny. I hate that your oldest is struggling with his recovery! Many prayers for him (and for you).

Greta said...

Cracking up. At both stories. You rock for even trying. Love from, Greta

{cuppakim} said...

OH man. Hahah. Both versions are awesome. Too bad only one of them could be true.

You are a great mama for trying. :)

Alyss said...

Hahaha! Bummer! You're right though. At least you tried.

theolivetree said...

This made me smile!

Betsi* said...

Oh brother(s)! This is precisely why I've given up on any plans to have good, enriching fun with my boys. I think our parents had it right: feed the kids breakfast and shove them out the backdoor. Then lock it.
Ok, but seriously, good for you for trying. And remember, kids often see situation #2 as if it were situation #1! I can just hear Charlie next week: "Remember when we made that yummy ice cream all on our own? Let's do it again, Mommy"

Stephanie said...

This cracked me up.. Sorry the ice cream turned out gross. That stinks. Hope the boys are feeling 100% soon!